You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
