Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
