a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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