perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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