I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
