I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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