The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
