Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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