chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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