Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
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You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
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Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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