Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
