Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
