I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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