Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
