...so i touched it.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
