ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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