i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize