Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize