I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
