I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
