I'm so fucking centered right now
Porn is love you can see.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
