so explain again why im purple
no
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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