He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.