Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
