I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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