I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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