There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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