You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
