would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
