Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins