I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Randomize