hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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