I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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