you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
