im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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