i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
