Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
