I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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