I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Is it because I queefed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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