Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
