My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
