i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
whose ass print is on the piano?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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