the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
