i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
