im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
