I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
