Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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