Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
