I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
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Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
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Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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