I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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