somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I deserve this hangover.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
